Set goals, practice skills,
end self-doubt
What to expect from
your first relationship coaching session and beyond
Relationship coaching can be both exciting and intimidating. Talking about relationships is vulnerable, and while that brings possibilities, it may raise an instinct for self-protection.
Bottom line: Relationship coaching is about exploring how you relate to desire and connection, and discovering tools to enable healthier relationships.
What will I be asked up front?
The first session is a chance to discuss what you want to get out of coaching. What was top of mind when you decided to reach out? What would progress look like for you?
The possibilities are vast and depend entirely on you, for example:
I want to be able to orgasm with a partner.
I want to feel more alive!
I want to stop having pain during sex.
I want to feel better about my body.
I want to move forward after infidelity (yours or a partner’s).
I’m tired of not wanting sex at all.
We will spend the first session clarifying your goals, and talking about how things will look if you work with me going forward.
My coaching style focuses on practicing skills and avoids long explanations (from you or from me). I will ask for relevant information, but I don’t expect you to pour out your life story.
In fact, I discourage it. Relationship coaching is about getting out of your head and into your body.
Safety and comfort
I create a space of no judgment, where you can feel safe to experience your feelings and begin to move past them. I will be there with you, every step of the way. If you can’t feel safe with me, then we are not a good fit for coaching and I will be happy to recommend someone else.
We go at your pace. In the first session, that might mean a flood of pent-up thoughts, and it might be no more than us feeling each other out. Whatever we do, I will show up with curiosity and presence. I am there for you.
And then what?
The first session is no-obligation. After we finish, I will leave you to decide whether I am a good fit for your needs, if you choose to go elsewhere, or if you want to put the whole plan on hold. You are never wasting my time.
If we do continue together, in each session we will identify a growing edge: something that you want to work on that day that moves you toward your goal. It might be expressing what you want, asking for something new, or letting yourself feel pleasure without performing. It could be about shame, or boundaries, or healing.
Between sessions, I might invite you to practice something we tried together: a conversation, an awareness exercise, or simply noticing your body’s signals in everyday life. We can then discuss how it went and what might make it even better.
There is nothing to get right or do correctly. The goal is simply to notice what happens, what you feel in your body, and what you can learn from that experience. This kind of embodied awareness is the foundation for intimacy, both with yourself and with others.
How does it differ from therapy?
The two big differences from therapy are that I ask very few questions, and we focus on skills.
Coaching is experiential, which means we practice. Based on the growing edge you want to work on each session, we will identify a tool that you would like to try out, in real time. That might mean role-playing a conversation, doing a visualization and saying how you feel, or trying a short experiment in how to handle something. I might model something first, and then invite you to try it in a way that feels safe and authentic for you. You can read more about the specific distinctions from therapy here.
If you’re curious about relationship coaching, I invite you to schedule a free consultation. Together, we can start uncovering what you truly want—and how to create a life that reflects it.
Click here and book your complimentary session now.